In my youth I couldn't have imagined the twists and turns, lumps, bumps, and seeds I would encounter through the years. In fact, I'm sure I never gave any thought to what I might be confronted with along my way. Its probably a good thing too, because if I had known some of the experiences I would walk through, I would have said, "No, thank you". But the older I get, the more I realize those experiences I would have refused are the very ones which produced the most growth, and ultimately the most beauty in my life.



     One unexpected experience was the birth of my son, Noah, who has Down Syndrome. Up to the time of Noah's birth, I had no experience or familiarity with Trisomy 21. This was a good thing for me, because I had no expectations or knowledge of worrisome details. I began to learn about Down Syndrome as I fell in love with my beautiful baby boy. I took things in stride without any anxiety about what might or might not happen in his life.....it didn't occur to me that I should have any concerns about what life might look like for him, me, or his siblings. We all accepted Noah just as he presented himself to us... and we continue to do so today. This was all good.



     However, as Noah began to get a little older, the reality of challenges presented by his disability became more apparent. Learning has been difficult for a variety of reasons. Good educational programs have been few and far between... this has been a true heartache for me. Self-care is an ongoing challenge, even though Noah has some skills in this area. And now, at 19 years of age, Noah is out of school and participating in a transition program... but its very unclear what we are transitioning to, or how well prepared he will be for life beyond school. This brief menu of issues are all things to which I would have said, "No, thank you".



        No parent would choose to have a child with a disability. And noone would fault a parent for admitting that they are struggling, and often wishing their child didn't have such challenges.... life is tough enough when all is well, even tougher to face when little things require supreme effort. But I have found my life to be enriched because of the efforts involved in raising Noah. I work in the field of Early Childhood Special Education because of Noah... I am able to positively impact parents of children with special needs because of Noah.... my other 7 children are compassionate and sensitive to others with challenges because of Noah... I have a great catalog of funny stories because of Noah.... I get a kick out of really quirky stuff because of Noah..... I am a better person because of Noah.



      I believe some of my most powerful growth has come as a result of raising Noah. And I am certain I would have said "No, thank you", if the challenges had been laid out before me. In fact, I know myself well enough to say I would not ever choose the more difficult path if given the choice. I am happy to report I have learned the value of struggle, hardship, and disappointment. I might not always smile the whole way, but I have learned to appreciate how the tough stuff paves the way for joy, growth, and beauty.



     Struggle can serve to bring out the best in us.... enlarge our hearts.... strengthen our spirits.... embolden our self-confidence. So when faced with something hard and you want to say, "No, thank you", just remember you might be getting an opportunity of a lifetime that you don't want to miss. Then smile to yourself.