The last crazy New Years Eve night that we can both remember was in...in....in....in...ok, well it's been so long we can't remember!  But that doesn't mean that we couldn't dig up some "good advice" to share with you all.  We just want to help you since we will be snuggled in by 10:34. OK so we aren't quite that dull, but, you know!  So here it goes...

1. Make sure you DON'T leave the house with kid snot or dried on crusty catchup still on your shirt sleeve.


2. The sparkles on your eyes should NOT match the sparkles on your shoes


3. The "height" of your hair should NEVER make you end up taller than your "date"


4. Always take a girlfriend to the bathroom to do a wardrobe check...leaving the bathroom with your skirt tucked in your underwear is a definite no no.  To add to that, if your skirt is too short to accidentally "tuck in"... Puleeezz change before you leave the house.


5. NO ONE gets "prettier" the more they drink...no matter what you see in mirror, know that blurred vision has taken over...also, you do not get skinnier as the night goes on either.  If it needed to be tucked in or "spanx'ed" when you left the house, it needs to stay that way, it is still there...


6. Remember that your kids will still be standing beside your bed whispering "mommy" at 5:00 AM no matter  how bad the room was spinning when you got into bed at 2:00 AM!


7. Under no circumstances should you kiss a random man at midnight...this is especially true if your husband is standing close by...Messy for a lot of reasons!!!


8. NEVER EVER EVER ask another woman if she is pregnant just because she doesn't have a drink in her hand!  This is so not cool!  OK I admit it...I did this!!  Cringe!! 


9. Dancing...what do we say about this...unless you are used to getting dollar bills tucked into your shirt, keep your "pelvic thrusts" to a bare minimum...those muscles are best saved for 80's style aerobics or birthing children.


10. Remember a little thing called "U-Tube and Facebook" and know that your future boss, potential date, kids teachers, birth mother (for those looking to adopt), and your teenagers have full access to its contents!


11. If you have breastfed more than three, two,  one child and your cleavage now resembles that of two pancakes hanging on a wall...please leave the v-neck to someone else.  Unless of course you know Victorias "secret"!!!                                                                       [EDITOR'S NOTE: This was obviously written by the EMM who has NOT breast-fed her children and has perfectly, perfect boobies! I am going to pretend she's NOT talking about me... hmmfff... in protest I will wear the lowest cut v-neck I can find... breastfeading moms unite! Carry on...]


12. If you do decide to go all out and put on false eyelashes, please remember to check them BEFORE you approach that cute guy.  You do not want him distracted by a clump of them stuck in your hair, and then picking them out in disgust.  This advice is based on a true story (poor girl!)...not cool!


13. If you're not a party animal but are still going over to friends to play games and maybe have a little drinky drink... DON'T use the stroke of midnight as a hall pass to make-out with your significant other... drunken, sloppy kissing and groping is best left to the privacy of your own room or in crowds large enough that you will blend in to the drunken debauchery... my eyes are still burning from last year!!


14. Wait until New Years DAY to text or post any pictures to facebook... you will be so so so glad you did!!!


15. Even if you're just staying home with the kiddos, sitting on the couch in your PJ's (asleep by 10:42 p.m.) Remember to take a second to yourself or with your man and toast to a great year... even if 2010 was horrible... you made it through alive sister!! So, let the snot blowing, butt wiping, potty training, gut wrenching "my tween is possessed", or white knuckled "OMG, my child is driving" 2011 begin!!